Having vs. doing vs. being

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Kristjan Vingel

There are three main levels of operating in this world. 

Spiritually speaking, people at the lowest paradigm mostly care about having - they worry about possessing - “what’s mine,” “this is mine,” “I can’t lose this” etc. Their self-worth so to speak is built around having material possessions. If they would lose their money, or they would go broke, then that would mean the end of their life. This is why some investors, stock-brokers, or other business people commit suicide when they lose their money. They operate on this level and can’t see beyond. Homeless people are also a great example of this - they don’t often even want to see the opportunities - they only care about the change (kleingeld).

There’s nothing wrong with “having” or “doing” per se. It’s the frame of mind it comes from what matters. We all own things, but we might see this possessing fro ma different angle. Some people will freak out if they lose their phone will others see the phone only as a tool and will just get another one when can - their life has bigger problems to solve than to worry about such petty things. 

The second level is “doing.” People in this paradigm of mind think they have to always “do” something in order to live up to their mind-projected higher self. They can’t be enough just being themselves; they always need to compensate. They always pursue, and they always need more and more - more money, more of this, a better car, a bigger house. These are e.g., the workaholics and self-help junkies.

Again, nothing wrong with working hard and hustling. We should hustle. The difference comes from the fact whether your self-worth is based on this “hustling.” Do you still feel perfectly at ease and enough if you stop doing everything? Will you be a different person than before? Let’s say you lose your job; you stop reading books, you don’t go to the gym anymore - would your self worth be affected? It really shouldn’t. You’re still the same person as you were before.

The highest state to operate is the “being.” This is when you know that your self worth is not affected by the things you have or by the things you do. You’re at ease with yourself no matter what happens externally. Besides, in many cases, we can’t control what happens around us. We can control our actions, but we often can’t control the outcomes. If you plan a picnic and then it rains the whole day heavily - has anything really changed?

KRISTJAN
Taipei, Louisa Coffee at 9.47am

Kristjan Vingel profile

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Kristjan Vingel

Hi, I'm Kristjan. I'm a software engineer from Estonia. I like to write about life and self-development.