There are no wrong choices
Kristjan Vingel
We are sometimes too quick to judge and categorize events as good or bad. E.g., you want to get a particular job in a certain city. You send out your CV and motivational letter and cross your fingers. If you don’t get the position, you view it as bad.
We do this a lot. The question is, how do we know it’s bad? Just because things did not go the way we wanted, doesn’t mean it’s necessarily bad. Otherwise, that would imply that our way is always a good way.
We rarely even know what’s best for us. We think we do, but often we’re wrong. Maybe if you’d gotten this position, your life would’ve ended up being miserable. Perhaps because you did not get the position you wanted, you get something better instead. The point is, we don’t know.
We shouldn’t judge events too quickly. Whatever happens, happens. Instead of viewing events as good or bad, it’s better to see them as different.
This good vs. bad also causes anxiety in making drastic decisions in our lives. We’re afraid that we make the “wrong” decision and therefore often end up not deciding at all. “What if I fail?” is basically the fear of making the wrong choice. Wrong = bad.
The truth is, there are no right or wrong choices, just different ones. There are endless amount of opportunities.
Since our brains aren’t really good at predicting outcomes, we can’t possibly see all the variations and take into account everything that could possibly come on our way.
So, no need to be afraid of failing or making a mistake. There’s no such thing. If you close one door, a new one will open. It’s the law of the universe. In fact, sometimes we have to close a door for the new one to appear.
This also means that failing doesn’t exist. Now that you understand that, what cool things could you do in this life knowing that you can’t fail?
KRISTJAN
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Hi, I'm Kristjan. I'm a software engineer from Estonia. I like to write about life and self-development.