On being unapologetic
Kristjan Vingel
Don’t ever apologize for who you are, what you like, what you enjoy, and what you want. Be absolutely unapologetic.
Too often, people try to dumb themselves down, pretending to enjoy things that others do, thinking that then people will like them more. Or if they’re being asked a question, they try to construct the answer in a way that is politically correct. They give a nice little safe answer.
Our society has become insane in a sense that people are even afraid to laugh at certain jokes - they look around looking at others to see if it’s okay to laugh.
I think we should laugh at everything. Humor means that we’re secure about ourselves and that we try to break the ice around us. People who are always serious, always offended, are generally really insecure about themselves. They take everything as a threat - they think everything is about them.
We can start by freely expressing our likes and dislikes. To be more authentic and stop trying to be a people pleaser. What you’ll discover, is that people will actually connect to you more - they sense you’re not putting up a fake front.
A really simple and silly example is the whole concept of a “guilty pleasure”. I get that it makes sense if it’s attached to e.g., food, but people also use it when they’re talking about music. How ridicilous is that? It’s as if you’re not supposed to like certain music.
I like Taylor Swift’s Shake It Off - and by like I mean, I really really like that song. It’s not a guilty pleasure - I think it’s one of the best pop songs of 2010s.
Own 100% of what you are, like, do, enjoy — no apologizing.
KRISTJAN
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Hi, I'm Kristjan. I'm a software engineer from Estonia. I like to write about life and self-development.